Art Of Hidden Pain!!!

Who hasn't had the experience of asking someone whether anything is wrong--for it's obvious from their expression or tone of voice that they're upset--only to have them respond: "No, I'm fine."? In such instances, clearly they're not fine but retreating into themselves to avoid a dialogue they fear might end up making them feel worse.

Why do people sometimes feel much differently than what they express, and why do they keep their true feelings in hiding? The reality is different people have different reasons. Some keep their true feelings much more hidden than others do.

Many different types of fears can be at work in creating hidden feelings -

• Not being good enough, or just enough
• Not feeling important or visible
• Not being loved
• Or of being too much so you feel you have to downplay yourself to make others comfortable

It is of course important for us to understand ourselves and know if we keep feelings hidden. There may be some very good reasons why we feel compelled to hide some feelings.

However, it is important in understanding others and their communications with us to know if their feelings expressed to us are their genuine feelings. That they are not a cover for their real feelings.

The reality is hidden feelings are actually sublimated emotions. Trying to escape or hide emotions can cause a lot of problems for the person holding them.

It can also create significant problems in trying to understand that person. What they really mean when they are communicating with us.

What's to be done?

If we truly want to make others more attuned to our vulnerable feelings, we need to manifest them physically and express them verbally. Finally, we can’t much blame others for their insensitivity toward us. Their level of sensitivity is simply where they are right now. And so, ultimately, it’s our responsibility to assist them in becoming more aware of and responsive to our feelings.